I've been making myself sick.

My daughter's name is Virginia.

She is named after a grandmother-type figure I had as a little girl.

The "real" Virginia chained smoked long cigarettes and drank beer out of a glass with a salted rim. She wore her white hair short and curled to her head and had those giant 1980's plastic glasses with the drop arms.

She was epic and she said THE MOST EPIC THINGS.

One of her more famous lines was, "My name is Virginia. Virgin for short, but not for long."

Hilarious, I know.

But my most favorite line of old Virginia's was....

"While you're busy doing nothing, get me a beer!"

Busy doing nothing.

I think of that hilarious one-liner often because, I've had my bouts with "busily doing nothing". And, if I'm being honest, I still catch myself in it all the time.

Sure I am high-functioning. Sure I meal prep and workout. Sure I created a movement with a laptop and a fuckton of grit, BUT I am always working on tightening things up.

I am always growing...evolving.

I am always becoming the woman I know I am meant to be.

I'm doing the work, and "the work" requires reflection.

I journal on this topic of "busy doing nothing" quite often and I've come to the conclusion that I busy myself because of my beliefs about money and my worth.

Growing up in a blue-collar hard-working family, I believed that I needed to work hard [and long hours] in order to be successful [aka valuable]. Only the hardest workers were rewarded. The others went back "on the books" at the Union Hall [aka the unemployment line].

Which, ya know, you've got to do the work in order to succeed, but I wasn't making the best use of my time. Rather, it was more akin to "busy work"....... mindless and mundane micro-actions that kept me spinning, anxious, and sleepless 24/7. I've even been taking stomach meds because I'm essentially making myself sick..... while I keep myself "busy".....

- constantly checking Facebook

- refreshing my inbox

- shuffling back and forth between several projects at once

- checking podcast stats

"Are we there yet?" "How 'bout now?"

"Busy doing nothing" is dangerous because you feel so busy you can't possibly stop for a moment to reflect on how much time you are wasting.

It's exactly like the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland. He was always running late and never really going anywhere.

If you believe you have no time to meal prep, exercise, or journal, YOU WON'T be open to change, because, ya know, "You are soooo busy you can't possibly take on another thing right now!"

Baby girl, we both know you've got to stop that shit because "busy doing nothing" isn't making you happy and it most certainly isn't getting you any closer to your weight loss goals.

Here is some tough love....

You totally have the time. You just suck at using it. It's 100% on you. Not anyone else. Not your husband. Not your boss. Not when the kids go back to school. YOU are the only one who needs to change and you're waiting for nothing at all. The time is always now. You will always be able to find an excuse if that's what you're looking for.

If you're not already, open yourself up to the possibility that you've been wasting your time for the sake of the busy [aka valuable] and handle yo shit because this is 100% on you. I promise, once you get intentional with your time you will get more done and feel at ease and in flow. You will become that Bad Bitch that you motherfucking KNOW you are meant to be.



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